Family Life Affairs: 15th September 2023
In 1996, sitting down after a court session in my office on military street Onikan Lagos, an elderly woman over 60 years of age walked in with my school Principal. She was filing for a divorce and I had to handle the brief. I asked why she was filing for a divorce after 40 years of marriage, “My husband is not taking care of me”, and she snapped back. Was she fed up, was there another man in her life? If there was, at what age? Has she gotten to her yield level? I couldn’t help but think through the night. A few months later, It was a pretty young lady in her mid-20s who sat as a client directly opposite me. She had been married with an elaborate ceremony for just 2 years. She needed a divorce at all costs. What was her reason? “I married the devil”. A couple of years back during the network news at 4 pm, A record-setting episode of marital crisis and divorce was reported of a couple somewhere in Switzerland who went back to the registrar who had just joined them in matrimony a couple of hours ago for a divorce right from the wedding reception.
Divorce is like death. It is the death of a relationship. Just like death, a marriage can die at an early, mid, or later stages. Why do marriages break? Why would a man head over heels with a young lady suddenly turn his heartthrob into a punching bag a few years after the marriage? If marriage is this problematic, is it worth it at all? The questions are endless. Few journeys in life will create as many crossroads as relationships. The reason for this is not far-fetched. The success of marriages, families, and homes will yield a successful society, city, and nation. The family is the smallest unit of God’s end-time army and of an advancing society, city, nation, and the entire world. The family is very important which is a major reason the enemy wages war against families. Of all the institutions created by God and man, none has been so badly attacked as that of marriage.
Are there answers to this problem at all? This program is designed to answer some of your questions. My objective is to present divine and Practical Principles. The application of this will ensure that your marriage is at the best God expects of it from the beginning. Marriage or relationship cannot be reduced to a mathematical precision. You cannot add 1+1=2 in every marriage. A major reason for this is because of the variable nature of man. What works for A might not work for B. The principles of God are firm, His standards are sure from one generation to another. God is unchanging and so is His word. Marriage is a responsibility and not a burden. It is designed to make life better and not bitter. There can be no better person than your spouse, all you need to do is discover him/her. Have you been considering divorce as an option, please come off it. A wise man once said those who lose hope go for the rope. Divorce is marital suicide, don’t go for it.
Did you just discover you are not compatible with your spouse? What is compatibility anyway? I have been married for a few years and have related with couples who have been married for many more years than I have, yet I have not found any couple in total compatibility. I think compatibility is all about change and adaptation. You will discover your marriage is one of the best around if you are willing and able to change and adapt. You cannot change your spouse. The only person willing and able to change and adapt is you. One area where the issue of compromise is considered best and allowed is the issue of marriage and relationship. Are you married to the devil? You can tame him with your change and the world will be a better place for you and everyone. The concept of marriage is not an American, British, or African invention. It originated from God. If yours must succeed, God’s blueprint for a healthy relationship must be followed. No one can best tell the purpose and function of a product like the manufacturer. The purpose and principles of a great relationship can only be secured in God.
What are the purposes of a healthy relationship?
Your marriage must not be patterned after what you see in Nollywood, Hollywood, or Bollywood. Not in any magazine or novel. The manual is the word of God. We will share God’s word and practical examples of people who are still standing. It is important to adequately prepare for marriage. I have discovered that we prepare for so many things in life including the wedding day, little or no preparation, and attention is given to the marriage itself. This is one of the reasons why marriages hit the rock. We expect so much without any serious preparation. My prayer is that your relationship and marriage will prosper and fulfill the counsel of God. You will get to know that the success of your marriage is how willing you are to make changes and adapt. You will also discover that the success of your marriage/relationship is largely dependent on the choices you make. What you are experiencing today are products of the choices you made yesterday. Choice, not chance, determines destiny. The success of a marriage or relationship is also determined by choice and not by any circumstances happening around it. I pray that God’s determinate counsel and purpose for your life and destiny will come to fulfillment in the mighty name of Jesus. Your marriage can work, Your marriage must work and your marriage will work. I am confident that as we engage biblical and practical experiences, our marriages will begin to blossom and prosper and we will build successful societies, cities, and nations all over the world and the church will advance. Jesus said upon Principles will I build my church (family) and the gate of hell shall not prevail. As we build on the principles of Christ, the gates of hell fighting marriages, families and relationships shall not prevail and the church shall press forward and push back hell and its agenda.
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